Love this. The people who need the most introspection are snobby rich liberals who thought everybody should think exactly like they do. This election made me really sick of that type. At least blue collar people care about their community.
Great article. My one disagreement is that I don’t think culture war issues are inconsequential and only social media creations. Interestingly, it’s probably true that they are, in fact, more materially salient in the lives of the upper middle class types freaking out over the election. IDK at this point but most likely these PMC types are more likely to have their kids in hyper woke schools and social groups (resulting in more kids going trans, girls having mental health issues, and boys being accused of various toxicities and crimes). And perhaps they are also more likely to work and live in the adult equivalent of such environments.
Yet despite those very real issues, they generally support the cultural left agenda uncritically, not because they really believe it, but rather because it’s too socially and professionally risky in those circles not to.
This creates an underlying imbalance in their perceptions that helps explain the freak out effect - if you’re not standing on solid ground, so to speak, a bump can really feel like an earthquake. Whereas if you’d just move over a bit, it wouldn’t have been such a huge deal at all. But they won’t. And there have been reasons for that. Hopefully it will now start to change.
This echoes my experience in a red state. If your car breaks down on the side of the road, guess who asks if you need a hand? HINT: It’s not upper middle class educated white people for the most part. They simply don’t have any faith in or use for the federal government. They also don’t grasp the implications of a clown car cabinet running the country and international affairs but that’s ultimately the government’s fault. Chill out. Read a book. Take a walk. Try to make your neighbor’s life a little better.
I'm thankful for you sharing these thoughts; I appreciate the perspective and agree with the arching sentiment. Also, kudos to you for your correct predictions.
There is one part I take issue with, however: That the horrible things a Harris administration would do would only be marginally less horrible than Trump's second administration. Sure, Harris might be far worse than what die-hard Democrats would believe her to be, but putting her and Trump in the same league seems... misguided. The fact that we came out of Trump's first administration mostly okay (with a few glaring exceptions) was due to people in his staff reigning him in, all of whom have been replaced at this point, most of them with sycophants.
You seem to be having a wonderful life. Tranquility and good fellowship pervade your environment as much as a Norman Rockwell painting. And I like Norman Rockwell. Perhaps some would say, yes, it is easy living in a silo, and I wouldn’t disagree but I really hope that the Norman Rockwell wins.
You know as an educated white liberal woman I’m, for the first time in my life, going, my family will be fine - maybe all these people I worried about and how happy I was for their income finally going up can take care of themselves and I need to worry less about them. Neither me nor my daughters will be dying from a botched miscarriage or having a baby we don’t want - if people are determined to vote for people who cause them and their families to do so, so be it. I have an enormous capacity for empathy but I’m damn tired of being ridiculed for it - I’m just going to put the working class and poor in the same category as the Sudanese, tragic of course, but I can’t allocated much emotional energy to it, it’s not my responsibility and I have a right to enjoy my own life. I’ll be able to afford the increase in grocery prices. My over educated silly ass with all those stupid facts and proven theories and understanding of history and shit can just stop giving a damn about all the people who think I suck so much. (This is not directed primarily at you - I really have seen dozens of these takes, including from educated liberal well off white women.) The kids… I won’t be able to stop being devastated about the kids but I’ll do my best. Their communities are choosing this, not much I can do.
I know it’s hard and frustrating but I really feel it’s important to have empathy for everyone. Regardless of who they voted for. Thanks for the comment
Hmm, going from the post and this comment I think your definition of empathy is much shallower and weaker than mine. I still have empathy for the Sudanese, I have empathy for everyone, it’s just not so much that it’s impacting my emotional well being. Maybe for some men that’s as much empathy as they’re capable of? But for many of the women you describe as hysterical - if you aren’t actually upset about the people you have good reason to think will suffer and die for no good reason or the fundamental changes to the kind of country you live in - you’re not actually experiencing empathy to any meaningful degree. You’re just making polite noises.
This is the best thing I've read since the election. You did a great job of yelling "get a freaking grip" in an empathetic way.
Thanks so much!
Love this. The people who need the most introspection are snobby rich liberals who thought everybody should think exactly like they do. This election made me really sick of that type. At least blue collar people care about their community.
this tracks with my own impressions
Glad to hear it! We’re in the majority!
Thank you for writing this! This made my day and brought me some genuine peace and happiness ❤️
Glad I could help!
What a great thoughtful piece. Thank you so much for sharing this, my experience definitely jives with yours.
Hey thanks a lot! Glad to hear it. We’re in the majority! Don’t forget it!
I won’t - I promise! :)
Great article. My one disagreement is that I don’t think culture war issues are inconsequential and only social media creations. Interestingly, it’s probably true that they are, in fact, more materially salient in the lives of the upper middle class types freaking out over the election. IDK at this point but most likely these PMC types are more likely to have their kids in hyper woke schools and social groups (resulting in more kids going trans, girls having mental health issues, and boys being accused of various toxicities and crimes). And perhaps they are also more likely to work and live in the adult equivalent of such environments.
Yet despite those very real issues, they generally support the cultural left agenda uncritically, not because they really believe it, but rather because it’s too socially and professionally risky in those circles not to.
This creates an underlying imbalance in their perceptions that helps explain the freak out effect - if you’re not standing on solid ground, so to speak, a bump can really feel like an earthquake. Whereas if you’d just move over a bit, it wouldn’t have been such a huge deal at all. But they won’t. And there have been reasons for that. Hopefully it will now start to change.
"Probably not a Kamala voter."
Isn't that *your* prejudice talking? Why shouldn't the gun guy who's friends with the black family vote for the black woman gun owner?
Ok man congratulations you got me 🤣
This echoes my experience in a red state. If your car breaks down on the side of the road, guess who asks if you need a hand? HINT: It’s not upper middle class educated white people for the most part. They simply don’t have any faith in or use for the federal government. They also don’t grasp the implications of a clown car cabinet running the country and international affairs but that’s ultimately the government’s fault. Chill out. Read a book. Take a walk. Try to make your neighbor’s life a little better.
I’m so deeply sick and tired of upper class liberal white people.
I'm thankful for you sharing these thoughts; I appreciate the perspective and agree with the arching sentiment. Also, kudos to you for your correct predictions.
There is one part I take issue with, however: That the horrible things a Harris administration would do would only be marginally less horrible than Trump's second administration. Sure, Harris might be far worse than what die-hard Democrats would believe her to be, but putting her and Trump in the same league seems... misguided. The fact that we came out of Trump's first administration mostly okay (with a few glaring exceptions) was due to people in his staff reigning him in, all of whom have been replaced at this point, most of them with sycophants.
You seem to be having a wonderful life. Tranquility and good fellowship pervade your environment as much as a Norman Rockwell painting. And I like Norman Rockwell. Perhaps some would say, yes, it is easy living in a silo, and I wouldn’t disagree but I really hope that the Norman Rockwell wins.
You know as an educated white liberal woman I’m, for the first time in my life, going, my family will be fine - maybe all these people I worried about and how happy I was for their income finally going up can take care of themselves and I need to worry less about them. Neither me nor my daughters will be dying from a botched miscarriage or having a baby we don’t want - if people are determined to vote for people who cause them and their families to do so, so be it. I have an enormous capacity for empathy but I’m damn tired of being ridiculed for it - I’m just going to put the working class and poor in the same category as the Sudanese, tragic of course, but I can’t allocated much emotional energy to it, it’s not my responsibility and I have a right to enjoy my own life. I’ll be able to afford the increase in grocery prices. My over educated silly ass with all those stupid facts and proven theories and understanding of history and shit can just stop giving a damn about all the people who think I suck so much. (This is not directed primarily at you - I really have seen dozens of these takes, including from educated liberal well off white women.) The kids… I won’t be able to stop being devastated about the kids but I’ll do my best. Their communities are choosing this, not much I can do.
I know it’s hard and frustrating but I really feel it’s important to have empathy for everyone. Regardless of who they voted for. Thanks for the comment
Hmm, going from the post and this comment I think your definition of empathy is much shallower and weaker than mine. I still have empathy for the Sudanese, I have empathy for everyone, it’s just not so much that it’s impacting my emotional well being. Maybe for some men that’s as much empathy as they’re capable of? But for many of the women you describe as hysterical - if you aren’t actually upset about the people you have good reason to think will suffer and die for no good reason or the fundamental changes to the kind of country you live in - you’re not actually experiencing empathy to any meaningful degree. You’re just making polite noises.
Plenty of hysterical men too. I think experiencing empathy without it negatively impacting our emotional well being is a good goal for all of us!
Interesting. You’re still not seeing it.
My eyes are wiiiiiiide open man 😎👍